I've had a few people starting out in leather ask me, “What gear should I get?” Perhaps they're on a budget and can't afford new boots, let alone a full formal look. Will they still be taken seriously? Or they've just found out about pup play and have planned an entire outfit—custom mask, paws, etc. They want to know if they should jump in and get the whole kit in order to try a scene. These questions (and talking with friends about their favorite gear) have me thinking about my own early forays into leather, and what I wish I'd known when I was starting out.
I want to start off by explaining what gear is and why we wear it. Then I'll offer permission to break what anyone claims are “the rules”. That said, fashion is in part about communication and group affinity: it helps to be aware of the norms for the space you're going to be in. We'll cover some of the common codes leather people use to read an outfit and how to deploy them. Then I'll talk about ways to find gear. Finally I'll go through a list of specific pieces, starting with ones I think are particularly beautiful, useful, inexpensive, or flexible. You can pick one or two pieces to start with (or nothing at all!) and get lots of mileage out of them.
This is a personal, not a universal narrative. It's based on my experiences in leather spaces from ~2010 to 2023, including bars, street fairs, runs, clubhouses, dungeons, and house parties, as well as reading and conversations with friends. My background is mainly in San Francisco, Chicago, and Cincinnati, as well as visits to various US and European cities—Portland, Seattle, New York, Atlanta, Fort Lauderdale, Provincetown, a slew of smaller midwest cities, Berlin, Paris, London, etc. Take what resonates with you. If you find a piece of gear you love and it's not here, embrace it. If my advice conflicts with your personal feelings or local culture, do your own thing!
On gender: I'm a masc-ish cis gay man, and my advice here is going to be mainly about masc-oriented and all-gender queer spaces. Some is applicable to people and spaces more on the enby or femme side of things, but I'm nowhere fluent in their codes. Use your best judgement and consult with people you trust.
Why Gear
In this post I use “gear” to mean “the stuff we wear when we're doing leather”: going to bars and events, playing at home or in dungeons, or just to make household chores more fun. We'll cover tools like floggers and rope separately.
Gear is rarely necessary, but it can be a lot of fun. We use gear to look and feel good. In social settings your gear signals group affiliation, suggests your interests, and attracts (or deflects) attention. In play, gear can build headspace and connection between you and your partners. Gear also serves a variety of practical purposes, from pockets to impromptu blindfolds, gags, and impact toys.
Some people are gear pigs: they love the look, feel, and scent of material or a style of gear. For others, like me, gear is fun but incidental to community and play. Some people don't care at all, and that's fine too!
Do What Feels Good
“That's a Sir's cap,” “You shouldn't have a lock on that collar,” “Never mix black and brown leather”, “If you didn't earn it, don't wear it.” Prescriptivist rules for leatherfolk are inescapable. Sometimes these come with purported historical origins: an “old guard” way of life. Others are the product of fantasy subcultures—there's no shortage of memes on Tumblr or stories on Nifty which describe a world with strict rules for dress. These rules often describe how person or leather family lived, or the norms for a bar and club. They can be good fun. Use them to inspire your own dress, if it resonates with you.
But leather—a culture of “sexual outlaws”—is not and has never been a monolith. Take “old guard” rules with a heap of salt: practices in the 1970s varied from coast to coast and between bars, clubs, and individuals, just like today. For every regimented full-BLUF-look leatherman, there's a radical faerie embracing full genderfuck; for every beer-swilling stone leatherdyke most comfortable in her Levi's, there's a goddess in brilliant turquoise head-to-toe latex. The US left/right active/passive code differed between east and west coasts and took years to settle. Gifted leather is a true delight but many of those OG leatherfolk bought their gear from shops or catalogs. Some people have collaring and covering ceremonies, but others just find a cap they like and run with it. That's OK!
In short: don't let a rule get in the way of having a good time. If it looks or feels good on you, if it expresses who you are (or who you want to be), if it attracts the kind of people you want to play with, or fits into your play, you should (broadly speaking) feel free to do it.
Working with Norms
The lack of hard-and-fast rules doesn't mean that leather has no cultural norms. Being cognizant of these norms will help you enter and participate in leather spaces, even if you choose to color outside the lines.
How strong these norms are depends on the kind of space you're in. When playing on your own you can generally wear whatever you want. With partners, you need only negotiate between the two (or five) of you. A public street fair like Dore or Folsom Europe embraces a riotously diverse range of looks. Runs like Gearup and Inferno have a similarly broad range of looks. These days remaining US leather bars generally have a relaxed dress code; sneakers and cargo shorts are usually fine at the SF Eagle. Some backrooms may insist on boots, and perhaps a vest or harness. Some bar nights or club events (like BLUF) may have a strict dress code—exclusionary boundaries are a part of what makes those affinity spaces possible. Private parties vary from “totally informal” to “everyone MUST be in a latex cocktail dress”; consult your host.
If you don't know the norms of a space there are several ways to find out. One is to ask someone who's been before—they can often tell you “Oh, yeah, a singlet would be great there” or “Definitely boots, not sneakers”. If the event organizers post photos of previous events, you can use them to get a sense of how people dress. You can also use event posters as inspiration—they often give a clue as to the general vibe the organizers are going for.
If you are at a loss for ideas, you can generally fit in at almost any bar or event with a pair of boots (think work, motorcycle, or combat boots), jeans, and a plain white or black T-shirt. Simple, classic, and accessible. There's a reason the earliest leather bars and clubs were often referred to as “Leather/Levi's” spaces! Add a handkerchief, or a leather wristband, armband, gloves, harness, vest, jacket, etc. if you like.
Finally: if you're not sure, stop worrying about gear and just go in whatever you're comfortable in, or what you think makes you look good. The worst thing that could happen is the bouncer might say “Sorry, not tonight”, and you have to politely excuse yourself. Perhaps you might feel a bit out-of-place. I've had both of these experiences myself. If you have social anxiety (hi), it can help think of this as intentional practice.
Speaking in Code
Speaking broadly, leatherfolk attach specific meanings to dress: colors, left vs right, collars, and so on. Knowing these codes will help you communicate with others—both by understanding how they're dressed, and by giving off interesting signals yourself.
Left Vs. Right
Something worn on the left side of the body generally signals a top, active, or dominant interest. Something on the right signals a bottom, passive, or submissive interest. A pair of keys hanging on their left belt loop? They might be a top. Wallet chain on the right? He might be submissive. Or maybe he just keeps his wallet there. I'd say about half the time left/right doesn't carry any particular meaning. To find out, you've gotta ask.
You can use this left/right polarity to signal your general alignment with keys, chains, toys, handkerchiefs, wristbands, armbands, to some extent watches, and basically any gear worn on one side. You can also use both sides at once to signal versatility (or distinct interests in each direction), or just that you appreciate symmetry. It's far from mandatory, but it is a way to hint at your general orientation and set the stage for conversation.
The Hanky Code
The hanky code uses colors (and to some extent materials) to indicate interest in various kinds of play. We call this “flagging”. Interpretations vary once you get off the beaten path, and many of the more obscure ones I've never seen used.
The most common ones I see are:
- Navy Blue: Fucking.
- Light Blue: Oral.
- Yellow: Piss.
- White: Jack-off, also cum.
- Brown: Scat.
- Red: Fisting.
- Gray: Bondage.
- Black: Heavy SM. Often used for impact play and other pain-related sports.
- Teal: Cock & Ball Torture.
- Houndstooth Biting.
- Purple: Piercing.
- Hunter Green: Daddy/boy, Sir/boy.
- Orange: Anything, anywhere, any time.
Again left usually signifies active, and right passive. A notable exception is orange. Some folks say orange right means “nothing right now”, but I know several people who flag orange right to mean “anything, submissively”. I think it's like 50/50. Always ask.
The classic way to deploy the hanky code is with a colored handkerchief hanging out of one's back pocket. Handkerchiefs are great for flagging: they're inexpensive, pair well with many outfits, and are easy to find in e.g. fabric and costume shops. It's also less ambiguous: lots of people wear colored shirts, but a handkerchief is a more intentional thing.
However, there's a long-standing tradition of using the code for all of one's outfit colors: Graylin Thornton describes Alan Selby at the Eagle insisting that the color of one's socks had to match their kinks. Leatherfolk often incorporate colors into their gear through piping, stripes, or the base material. I was once picked up by a gentleman in the IML market simply because I had on a red T-shirt. He asked if I was into fisting and I said no, I simply liked the shirt. This led to a lovely conversation and a mind-blowing scene later that night. Months later he taught me to fist him, bringing things full circle.
Common gear colors—black and brown leather, white or black shirts, blue jeans—usually aren't interpreted as a specific signal. I think the consensus among most leatherfolk today is that colors are simply too much fun to limit yourself to your particular kinks, and that you should feel free to wear whatever colors you like. Just don't be surprised if someone asks about it, because there's a good chance an outfit color does signal a particular kink.
If you know you have an interest in a specific thing—or if you'd like to be introduced to it—try flagging that color! Just be honest about your experience and interests when someone asks. And... maybe hold off on orange until you have a sense of just how much “everything” could mean.
Collars
Collars are usually chains, steel, leather, rope, neoprene, or textile around the neck. They typically signal that person is in some kind of submissive relationship. A padlock is usually a sign of a stronger, longer-lasting bond. A less serious closure, like a padlock left unclosed, a hasp, carabiner, or snaps, may denote a weaker bond. I see this infrequently, but I've read that an unclosed padlock can signal you're hoping that someone else will put the lock on you—either for the night or years to come, and I think that's charming.
Collared people generally have rules. These can be very broad—many are polyamorous or at least open for play. A collared person might have latitude to talk with and play with anyone they like. They might need to seek permission from their Dom before playing, or only be able to engage in certain kinds of play. They could also (and this is less common) have very strict restrictions. I've met collared slaves who were forbidden from talking to strangers without their owner's permission.
Some leatherfolk won't approach someone wearing a collar, either because they assume that they need to engage that person's owner first, or because they're looking for someone who's unattached. Conversely, collars can sometimes attract interest: you may be perceived as a possible partner for submissive play, or someone may just think you look hot. Like wearing a wedding ring, people treat you differently.
For pups, I don't think collars are as strong a relational signal. For many pups the collar is a marker of pup identity or pack membership, rather than belonging to someone specifically. Others collar themselves. A lock on a pup is usually a stronger signal than just a ring and tag, or some other closure.
For new folks I suggest holding off on wearing collar in public until they've got a little experience. There are lots of other ways to signal submissive interest, if that's what you're looking for, and wearing a collar might prevent you from making some fun connections.
A piece of etiquette, while we're here: never touch someone's collar without permission. Some folks are fine with it, but it can be a deeply personal thing.
Hats
The classic Muir cap, often called a “cover”, can carry a dominant valence and connotes a degree of experience. For many it indicates they're engaged in more of a Sir or Master role. Some people take offense to wearing a cover you “haven't earned”, though plenty of Doms worth their salt just purchased theirs at a shop.
Wearing a cover might close off the option to play as a sub. As a newbie there's also some risk of being perceived as lacking the experience to back up what the cap implies—it could feel like “false advertising”. I generally don't advise that new leatherfolk wear a cover until they're comfortable operating in leather spaces. Personally, I've been playing mostly on the Dom side for years and I still don't think I could pull one off.
For men, a less formal leather cap with a matte (rather than glossy) bill, an even crown, and minimal trim, like this one from Mr. S, can be a good alternative. You'll sometimes hear this called a “boy's cap”, though you'll see all sorts of people wearing one. Likewise, garrison caps are loosely associated with leatherboys—they also, for obvious reasons, carry a bit more of a regimented/military vibe. Ball caps (either leather or textile) can be pulled off by basically anyone. Cowboy hats are just fun.
I think of these hats as broadly masc-coded, but through the magic of ✨ gender ✨ you can integrate any of them into a hard butch, enby, or predominantly femme aesthetic too. Codes for femme hats in leather are a mystery to me, though I've seen some fabulous fascinators in my time. Enby hats are a Tier III tech I have yet to unlock.
Hints, Not Boxes
To repeat: none of these are hard-and-fast rules. Pups frequently collar themselves but are looking for a handler. Lots of people wear red but don't fist. Treat all of these codes as conversation starters, but don't rule someone out just because of what they're wearing!
Acquiring Gear
Discover Looks
Watch people. No, really, watch them. This can be a little weird if you're used to downplaying bodies, sex, and clothing, but it's a skill worth practicing. Look at the cut and how it falls on their body; what it shows off, what kinds of feelings it brings up in you. Are there referents you can identify? Watch how people interact with the gear: where do they tug, how do they look at it, what parts of the body do they touch? Be polite about this, of course. We're talking a few glances, not a prolonged stare. If someone's talking to you, you can look more.
If you like something, it's often okay to approach someone and ask about it. “Hey, you look fantastic in those pants. Can I ask where they're from” is a perfectly serviceable opening line.
Photos and videos are a great way to find inspiration. Film and photo exhibitions are good for this, but also consider porn, photobooks, graphic novels, and social media. Find images that you linger on, that you return to again and again. Can you incorporate some aspect of them into your own style?
You often don't know what you'll like until you see, smell, and feel it on you. Take as many opportunities as you can to try things on: at shops, vendor marts at events, swap meets, and with friends.
What You Have Already
Chances are you already have a lot to work with at home. Go through your closet with an eye towards playing with power, gender, and class. Think about the archetypes you'd like to embody that day. A pair of high tops and your favorite underwear might be all you need for a great scene or a dance party. Those cargo shorts and faded ball cap could be bear catnip. Your girlfriend's lace panties might look great on your furry thighs. A pair of work boots, wool socks, and a yellow checked flannel can melt the iciest of lesbian hearts. Levis and a bomber jacket is serviceable barwear. And suits! Suits are a whole thing!
Consider sportsgear. Those football pads, wrestling singlet, or rugby uniform can make for incredible scenes. Helmets and gloves can be transformative. The same goes for safety equipment. Motorcycle gear can be an erotic goldmine, as can wetsuits, welding helmets, and woodworker's aprons. Uniforms too—an air force flight suit or UPS browns can make for a great scene. Jumpsuits are especially fun when unzipped low at the bar.
If there's a part of your body you (or others) like, show it off by going slightly too tight. Shirts and pants can be made much more fun with a pair of scissors: convert a tee to a crop-top or rip a hole in the crotch, legs, or ass of some old jeans. You can also make a more formal look slutty by leaving something out, or substituting something inappropriate. Wearing a jacket? Maybe lose the shirt under it, or replace it with mesh or spandex. Or a harness. Or rope from the hardware store. Another thing you can leave out is underwear: even if nobody else notices, it changes how you feel.
Grab the gender knobs and twist them with wild abandon. Dress to play up your beard and fur, or shave your legs. I have a friend who shaves his entire body (even eyebrows) for an intensely submissive trip. If you're usually femme, try a jockstrap. If you're usually masc, try lace. Corsets and heels can be for everyone, just like denim jackets and boots. You can do a lot with hair and grooming too.
Friends
Friends are an under-rated way to try out gear. Ask your friends or play partners if they have anything they think you'd look good in, and try it on. You can just hang out or make it part of a scene. If you find something you like, many of us give, trade, or sell pieces to friends. I've lost track of how many jockstraps I've sent home with friends as post-scene prizes. You can do this through the mail too, if you have friends online.
Used Gear
You can get a surprising amount at thrift shops. If you like fucking with gender, just wander in to the “wrong” (read: fun) side of your local Goodwill and start getting creative. Used sporting goods stores are great (especially if you're a scent pig), as are military surplus shops.
Another good source for used gear—especially when you're looking for something specific—is eBay. There are also fetish-specific marketplaces like Second Skin, though prices can be inflated for rare or “well-used” pieces.
You can find swap meets at leather runs like Gearup and Inferno, and sometimes local leather contests or bar events. This is a great place to discover unusual pieces and to get a good deal on them.
New Gear
If you have a local leather/fetish shop, or can visit one while traveling, it can be a great way to find gear—they'll have a broader selection. Most major leather/fetish/etc events like Folsom, MIR, IML, CLAW, and MAL have fantastic vendor marts where you can compare pieces from makers all across the country. You can also find pop-up shops and individual leatherworkers at bars, campgrounds, and runs.
Buying gear online can be trickier: you can't see it on your body and have to wait for the post. That said, you'll have a broader selection, and it's a good option if you don't live in a leather Metropolis. I've had good experiences with Mr. S, Rough Trade, 665, Boxer, Doghouse Leathers, Full Kit Gear, Barking Leather, RoB, Regulation, Northbound, Nasty Pig, and SlickItUp, to name a few.
If you're into high-viz workwear, uniforms, sports equipment, etc, you can often buy it directly from the manufacturer or at specialty shops.
Material matters. Cotton, rubber, neoprene and lycra stretch! Leather, not so much. Leather shirts and pants might fit off the rack, but if your body isn't close to their form it may require custom work. Harnesses are often sold off the rack but left unfinished; they measure them on your body and cut & finish the snaps while you wait. This is easy in person, and trickier remote. Gloves, caps, collars, wrist and armbands are easier to measure yourself. Boots... your mileage may vary. As with any footwear, try them in person if you can.
Custom Work
If you're after something custom, you may be able to find a local craftsperson (or ask one at an established shop) to make a piece for you. Most leather shops will do custom work, and some smaller vendors like Dirty South Leather specialize in custom. This is usually going to be a bit more expensive, so I think it makes sense to hold off on custom pieces until you've got your heart set on something.
If you see someone with unusual gear you like, ask where it's from!
Specific Pieces
This is the list I wish I'd had when I was starting off as a leatherman, based on how I've come to play and how I like to look. It starts with pieces that are more versatile, practical, easier to find, and less expensive, then moves into more specialty items. Nothing is mandatory; these are merely suggestions. I generally suggest trying one thing at a time and building up over years, rather than buying All The Gear Up Front. Most of these pieces work with each other and can be used in a variety of looks.
A safety disclaimer: this post talks about ways to play, but is not an instructional manual for those things. There is no detailed discussion of safety or technique. Don't attempt to (e.g.) gag or hit someone without obtaining proper education.
Nothing
You do not need a single piece of gear to be leather as fuck. None. Play naked. Go to the bar in your street clothes. Masturbate wrapped head to toe in yellow caution tape. Gear pigs may disagree, but in my book leather is about headspace and connection. Neither requires gear.
Headspace is what goes on inside your mind: realizing fantasy and exploring aspects of your personality that might not normally be expressed. Can you feel yourself as the powerful, demanding vixen with a pack of kittens at her beck and call? Can you be the dumb, horny, drooling jock? The loving, obedient, and protected leatherboy? The domineering and aggressive Sir? With practice, you can do all these things in what you're wearing right now.
You want to be a pup? Find a patch of carpet and get on all fours. Wag your butt. Nose a ball around. Give a few howls. Ideally, get some scritches from a trusted pal. If you managed to shake off your human cares for a minute and experience a momentary joy, congratulations! You're a real pup now. You'll find your certificate and official membership card in the mail.
Connection is how you relate to other people. Can you socialize in a way that makes them feel appreciated and seen? Can you empathize with your play partners? Give them your vulnerability, and honor their trust in you? Can you excite, arouse their anger, inflict exquisite pain, softly stroke, and comfort them? Receive those sensations and give back your attention, resistance, delight, and gratitude? Can you do these things safely and consensually? This requires experience, social intelligence, integrity, creativity, charisma—but not gear. Some of the most intense & skilled leatherfolk I've played with lived in a pair of worn jeans, a fading tee, and Skechers sneakers.
The right gear can foster headspace in you and your partner, and help build connection when you play, but it's not required.
Great. So what if you want to add a piece of gear? I'd start with...
Boots
A pair of leather boots is one of the most versatile pieces of gear you can own. You can wear them with shorts or long pants, kilts, dresses, textile, rubber, neoprene, leather, masc or femme looks. In a neutral color they'll work with almost anything. Boots are an essential element for most code nights, and paired with jeans and a tee are a perfectly cromulent bar look. Their weight, patina, and protection contributes to headspace whether you're feeling Sir, boy, or switch.
Boots can create connection. People will strike up conversations about your boots. They'll comment on the quality of your shine, or ask where your scuff marks are—have you been on your knees recently? They'll get down and lick them, which can be a whole scene in itself. You can also press the tread into someone's skin (clothed or nude!) for intense effects.
Boots can fill time. If you walk into the bar, know no one, and are scared to talk to people, you can fill 30 minutes by sitting down in the bootblack's chair and letting them work their magic. You now have a perfectly legitimate reason to be there.
I'd look for something like the famous, now increasingly-difficult-to-find Corcoran 995 10-inch side-zip jump boot. You ought to be able to find something similar at a military surplus store or boot shop in the $100—$200 range new, or ~$25 used. Leather culture draws heavily on military and biker aesthetics, and a combat boot is appropriate for basically any leather context from back alley to formal banquet. Black goes with everything, but browns and oxbloods are also common. An all-leather upper (as opposed to textile or rubber) means you can shine the entire boot. A side zipper means you don't have to unlace and re-tie to get in and out. Properly cared for, they should last decades.
Your boots, like all your gear, need not be new or fancy. Well-loved gear is great, and any bootblack can help you restore a worn-but-structurally-intact boot to serviceable condition.
For a more femme look, try something with more gloss or a higher heel. Cowboy boots, work boots, and motorcycle boots (classic or sportbike) are also popular, broadly available options. Don't put a ton of money into boots until you know you're a Boot Person—then sure, salivate over custom Wescos. If you are already a boot person, you should know about Stompers.
A few boot tips! One, orthotic insoles can make boots a lot more comfortable. Two, boot laces come in lots of colors. Here's a chance to use that hanky code! Three, there's lots of neat ways to lace your boots.
Belts
Chances are good you already have a leather belt that matches your boots. If not, it shouldn't be hard to find one for a few bucks at a thrift shop. The buckle can be as plain or ostentatious as you like.
Belts also have more practical uses: you can clip a baton, handcuffs, or flogger to them. You can put someone in handcuffs and slip the chain behind the belt to restrain their wrists to their waist. You can pull your belt tight around wrists or ankles to make an improvised restraint in a scene. Folded in half and again into quarters, it makes a versatile and powerful impact toy for paddling asses or whacking on other large muscle groups. You can also bite down on it.
Tall Socks
Boots generally need tall socks. I like below-the-knee: for me they stay up better than mid-calf. Pick any color and pattern you like. When you're wearing shorts (or no pants), this can be a way to flag.
A pair of tall socks pairs well with sneakers for a sportier look, either at the bar or dancing. They're comfortable for everyday wear. Tall socks are also fantastic for stashing things when you don't have pockets. Wrap a few bills around your ID and credit card and slide it into one sock, and your phone into the other. (Tie your housekey to your shoelaces.)
Your socks can be re-deployed as a blindfold or gag—either tied around the head or balled up and shoved between the teeth. You can also put a balled up sock, a bit of rice, or anything else soft into one sock and swing it as an improvised impact toy. Tall socks can also be used to protect the tails of floggers during transport.
One good option is soccer/football/baseball/etc socks: they come in fun patterns and colors, are generally durable, and you can find them at sporting goods, department stores, and all kinds of web sites. I've had good luck with Under Armour and Adidas. Another option is gray wool hiking socks or olive military socks from the surplus store—they pair nicely with brown work boots for more of a lumberjack look. I rarely see dress socks with boots, perhaps because they're less cushioned.
Most fetish brands make socks with recognizably kinky designs. I like these—they're a fun way to exchange knowing glances on public transit. That said, construction can be hit-or-miss. Nasty Pig's new knit seems liable to tear at the drop of a hat, and I'm constantly patching holes. Both Full Kit and Boxer's socks seem to slide down my calves, either due to height or lack of elasticity. I've got a recent pair of Cellblock 13 socks that works well though! Explore in person if you can.
Handkerchiefs
I cannot say enough good things about handkerchiefs. They cost $5, you can find them almost anywhere, and they add a pop of color to any outfit. They work for all genders and all bodies. Get one in any color that matches your interests.
A handkerchief lets you flag with anything that has back pockets. It signals leather overtones for those in the know without disturbing heteronormative sensibilities. You can fold your handkerchief into a rectangle and slide it neatly into a pocket, revealing a neat, thin band of color. You can fold diagonally, exposing a triangle or “home plate” pentagon with the point aiming down. Iron the fold to make it nice and flat. You can also shove them in loosely for a more relaxed look.
No pockets? Tie a handkerchief on your wheelchair to let people know you're a fist top. You can fold it diagonally over and over into a long, thin strip, and tie it around your wrist or forehead. If you fold only partway, leaving a flat triangle, it can go around your neck. This is particularly cute for pups.
That same diagonally-folded strip makes the perfect size for an improvised, comfortable blindfold or gag. Both of these can lead to fun scenes at bars, at home, and even on the dancefloor.
You can soak a handkerchief in water (or piss!) and place it over the bottom's face for a delightful sensory trip. You can also use it to mop up various fluids. I guess you could even sneeze into it, if you're into that sort of thing.
Jocks
For those of you on the masc side of things a jockstrap can be a true delight. They connote Masculinity! and Sports! ™. They frame butts nicely. They leave your hole and most of the skin exposed, which means you can do all kinds of play (spanking, biting, rimming, fucking, figging, fisting, etc.) without pulling your underwear down. They look great on Tops too! Let the waistband ride up above your jeans and get into trouble at bars.
A jock, socks, and boots is a hot and practical outfit for one-on-one scenes, play parties, and certain kinds of bars and dances. People may tell you this is basic. That's OK: there's nothing wrong with being a basic bitch if you're having fun doing it. Be as creative or predictable as you like.
Jocks pick up your scent, which you can then push in other people's faces—or your own. You can shove a jock in someone's mouth while doing terrible things to them. People love to soak jocks in piss, cum, and sweat, then mail them to each other. Your author, who is virtuous and pure, would never do these things, but he's heard others have.
You can find jocks in all shapes, sizes, materials, and colors—yet another chance to flag. It's hard to go wrong here. Pick whatever looks good and is reasonably priced for you. The Bike is a classic, but the pouch knit can be a little rough—some like that, some don't. I'm also partial to Nasty Pig's core jock, which has a really dense, soft fabric, and Pump!'s mesh jocks, which are a little more stretchy & breathable.
If jocks don't speak to you for whatever reason, find underwear that does. Every style, from dad's Y-front white briefs to boxer jocks to thongs to the frilliest lace panties, is appreciated by a sizable contingent of leatherfolk. Or go without underwear! Do what makes you feel hot.
Gloves
Leather gloves are great. They work with full formal outfits, jeans and a tee, or just a jock and boots. A good pair of gloves can help you get into headspace. They work for both Doms and subs, but I find that a Dom wearing a pair of gloves adds an extra layer of authority to a scene.
You can flag with your gloves too: shove 'em into the appropriate jeans pocket with a bit left showing.
Gloves are great for play, both at home and at the bar. “Gloves over mouth” is a whole specialty, but gloves add extra charge to any tactile play: cuddling, stroking, punching, pinching, slapping, wrestling, and so on. They soften the sting for spanking a bit, which is nice for sensitive bottoms. You can pull your gloves off and slap someone with them. You can also shove a pair of gloves into someone's mouth to fantastic effect. Some people use their gloves for insertive play: putting fingers into the mouth, anus, or vagina.
I swear by search gloves. I've tried a lot of gloves, and the ones I (and many of my friends) like are from Tough Gloves—specifically the Patrol-X or Elite models. The leather feels amazing, I like the clean cut of the wrist, and it's thin enough that you can still do most tasks (say, tying a handkerchief) without pulling the gloves off every three minutes.
Vest
A bar vest is a simple, flexible, and practical way to leather up a look. They're suitable for a broad range of contexts, from street to bar to dungeon to formal event. Together with your boots, it'll unlock more spaces that expect a more leather-oriented dress code.
Jeans, vest, and no shirt works well for a more cruisy space like a bar or dungeon, and is a good chance to show off abs, belly, fur, tattoos, piercings, nips, and so on. Vests can also be worn over tees or button-downs to add a bit of formality and visual interest. A vest over a shirt can be worn on the street or to dinner without causing a scene, but also clearly signals “hey, I'm leather too”. It's a common look at a bar, contest, or educational event.
Vests usually come with a pair of pockets, which is great if you're, say, wearing chaps and can't use your front pants pockets any more. I use mine for phone and wallet all the time.
Because there are no sleeves and the front doesn't close, it's easier to find a vest with a good fit off the rack. Vests also tend to adjust a bit better than e.g. a shirt as your body shape and size changes. Look for side lacing if you'd like more adjustability.
Compared to leather shirts or jackets vests allows more airflow, so they don't get hot in crowded bars. They also leave your arms free to (e.g.) throw a flogger. You can also wear one straight to the bar, whereas a harness might involve a somewhat awkward period of shirt-over-harness or harness-over-shirt.
Vests are a great place to put pins and patches. I thought these were silly at first, but then I started accreting pins and I've come around to it. You can get pins for your name and pronouns, clubs, contests, social movements, people you like, various kinks and hobbies, and so on. If you're on the shy side, reading someone else's pins or letting them look over yours can be a good way to discover a mutual interest.
Bar vests are usually black, but other colors can be striking. They come in lots of cuts and with various piping designs and inlays. A classic men's bar vest should hug your body, terminate at the belt-line, and the front edges should align with your nipples. I think 665's vest here shows a fairly good fit for the classic cut. There are lots of other cuts out there, and vests with front zips or buttons that create different effects. Play around and find something that works for your body and desired look.
Vests are easier to fit off the rack, so there's a good chance you can find one used or from a leather shop as-is. Expect to pay $100-$200 new. Bodies vary, so try on a few from different makers if you can.
Wristbands, Armbands, etc
These are decorative, fun, and (often) cheap accessories. Their small size is good for travel, and they're a nice way to add a bit of leather to any outfit. Wear 'em on the right to signal a more passive mood, and on the left for more active, or symmetric if you prefer. They often come in fun colors and designs. Leather and neoprene are both common.
Pretty much everyone makes these: they're not at all hard to find. Some wristbands have zippered pockets inside, which can be a handy way to store cash.
Harnesses
Harnesses look great, come in a broad variety of forms and colors to fit different bodies, and have practical use in play. They're great fun to tug on while roughhousing or fucking. Harnesses also provide convenient attachment points when restraining someone at the bar—you can integrate them into a rope tie, hook cuffs or carabiners through them, and so on.
Most harnesses have buttons that you can adjust as your body changes, or when sharing gear with a friend. Some are convertible in various ways. I have a pair of suspenders that becomes an X-back harness I quite like.
There are some practical drawbacks to harnesses. One is that if it's cold, there are (sigh) straight people around, or you need a shirt for some other reason, you may wind up wearing a shirt over your harness. This can be mildly uncomfortable and looks a bit odd, but it can also be hot sometimes.
This is sort of hard to articulate, but a harness is a less reliable hint than, say, a vest that someone is what you might call “culturally leather”. Bars and circuit parties are chock full of shirtless men in leather harnesses. Some of them are leathermen. Others like the look but don't have any interest or expertise in play. A good fraction are kinky, but aren't as connected to the subcultural codes, practices, and network of leather community. These are all valid, but sometimes you're interested in being a little more specific what you're about. Layering additional hints—a handkerchief and boots, perhaps—can help make a harness a more obvious signifier, if that's what you're after.
Leather harnesses are about as expensive as a vest: plan on $100-$200 new. Pretty much every major leather/fetish vendor sells a variety of harnesses. Get fit for one in person if you can. You'll want to see how various strap patterns fall on your body, and once you choose one it's usually sized to you while you wait. There are also neoprene options which offer stretch, easy washability, and vibrant colors. Rubber harnesses also exist!
Chaps
Leather pants are great, but I've found chaps offer most of the visual and sensory impact of full pants, while being easier to fit, more flexible, and a bit cheaper. They work fine with a plain T-shirt up top. Boots, chaps, and vest gets you a very traditional leather look. Combine with gloves or wrist/armbands for a little extra.
Most chaps use laces or adjustable buckles which lets them adapt to thicker or thinner waists, and because they don't cover the butt they're suitable for pancakes and poundcakes alike. You really just need to make sure that a.) the inseam is about right, b.) they fit snug around the thigh, and c.) you can fasten the waist.
You can wear chaps with nothing underneath, or just your underwear for a bit of color and coverage. This can be a great look for a play party. Thanks to the zippers you can get in and out of chaps without having to pull off your boots, which can simplify play. Wear them over jeans for a street-legal look that will also work for bars and backrooms. You can flag with the back pockets. Chaps usually cover up your front pockets, which can be frustrating—consider using your vest pockets instead.
Unlike leather pants, chaps allow you to sit down and bend over comfortably.
A pair of well-made leather pants might run $500; chaps around $400. You can find them from most dedicated leather shops, and to some extent at places that deal in motorcycle gear. Sometimes they show up at thrift shops too.
“Formals” or “high cow” means a sharp-looking, finer outfit made primarily (often entirely) of leather. Cut, colors, and patterns can vary from plain black to wildly colorful, and from understated to complex piping, and paneling with intricate designs. The important thing it looks clean, neat, and good on you.
For example, a formal outfit might comprise a pair of leather jeans, a leather uniform shirt, boots, belt, Sam Browne, and tie. You could add a vest, gloves, armbands, and/or hat if you like.
You'll find formals at bars, contests, event lobbies, banquets, parties, and street fairs. Unless you're at something like a BLUF event or a formal banquet, they're essentially never required. Lots of leatherfolk don't have formals. If you're really in to the look, go for it, but otherwise I'd suggest holding off.
For some leatherfolk a formal look generates intense headspace and fosters the kind of connection that's important, even necessary for their play. For most of us I think formals are more for socializing and being seen in than for actually playing: they can be uncomfortably warm, restrictive, and you don't want to scuff your finest pants by getting down on your knees.
Formals have other drawbacks. They cover up lots of skin that you might want accessible for play. They're cumbersome to get on and off. They're expensive—think a couple thousand dollars new. Because leather doesn't stretch much, they're hard to fit and may require custom work. As your body changes you may find your formals no longer fit well.
Formals are generally a specialty item: you'll probably need to find a leather-oriented vendor, independent tailor, or used marketplace. Because they fit the body closely, this is one of those places where I think you really want to try gear on in person instead of online.
Pup Stuff
Pups love hoods. For many it's an instant path to pup headspace. There's a mild sensory deprivation aspect that's fun. I also think a lot of pups who aren't comfortable with social interaction appreciate the anonymity of a hood: it hides their face and provides a simplified script for how to interact with strangers. I one myself and use it for play, but as someone who's a tad hard of hearing I find hoods mostly frustrating in bars and other social areas—it's difficult for me to understand people if they're wearing a hood, and if I'm wearing mine it's hard to hear others. Fine if you're nonverbal, though!
Leather pup hoods look and feel great, but for a first hood I suggest neoprene. They're much cheaper and come in all kinds of fun colors. They stretch better, which improves comfort and makes them easy to take on and off. They're fine with water so you can sweat in them, wear them to the pool, and just dunk them in the sink to clean. They're also soft, which makes them easier to pack, and hurts less when you nuzzle into someone's face.
If you get hot easily, or are going to wear a hood on the dance floor, consider one with an open back instead of one that encloses the whole head.
Basically every fetish vendor makes pup hoods (and sometimes matching gear!), so shop around and see what resonates with you.
If you're going to be on all fours on hard surfaces (whether as a pup or just because that's where play takes you) a pair of knee pads can really improve your life. You probably want soft pads instead of hard ones, so you don't inadvertently injure people or scratch up the floor.
Basically every pup I know has problems with knee pads not staying in place—it's not just you. I've asked around a lot, and I don't think there's firm consensus on What To Get. My favorites are CK's Wraptor 2.0, which is designed for wrestling, and that's pretty close to pup play. You should be able to find something like this in the $20—$30 range at a sporting goods store.
A pair of soft mitts also makes being on all fours easier. You can get dedicated padded bondage mitts for this, which are fun because you can't use your hands any more. My favorites are from Fetters: they're sturdy, locking, and feel amazing, and you can use them in all kinds of bondage contexts. Pricey, though, and you can absolutely find cheaper out there. Many of us prefer MMA gloves, which leave your fingers free, provide wrist support, and plenty of padding. You can find those at sporting goods stores for as little as $20, and as a bonus they're fun for punching scenes.
Pro tip: you can quickly convert MMA gloves (or bare hands) into helpless mitts with 3M Vetrap—an elastic bandage that sticks to itself but not to skin or hair. Vetrap is cheap, re-usable if you're careful, and has all kinds of uses for restraint and sensory deprivation.
Rubber
Rubber operates in a sort of parallel universe to leather: we occupy the same spaces, many people are into both, but stylistically we make somewhat different choices. There's an adage that one doesn't mix rubber and leather as materials. This is absolutely not a hard rule, and I've seen people look fantastic in mixed outfits, but do keep in mind that rubber generally commits you (and every surface you touch) to being coated in silicone lube, and that may be hard to clean off your leathers.
Your high socks and boots (or sneakers) can work with many rubber looks. High socks will catch the sweat, and the more sock exposed, the more the socks can wick away and evaporate that water. Many people start with just rubber underwear or a pair of rubber shorts, and wear those on their own. I've also seen rubber shirts and harnesses combined with jeans. Full-coverage looks, including catsuits and surfsuits, make popular outfits at bars and events.
Neoprene
Neoprene is a magical material. It's thick like leather, stretches and hugs the body like lycra, doesn't require the lubrication of rubber, and is washable like most textiles. It's unusual enough to feel fetishistic. You can get almost everything in neoprene from a variety of gear vendors: pants, shirts, underwear, caps, harnesses, pup gear, and so on. Many of these can serve as drop-in replacements for the other gear we've talked about. Mix and match as you see fit!
Some people are specifically into wetsuits. If that's your thing, dive in!
Lycra
Lycra/spandex is a low-key fetish for lots of folks, and one that you can build a whole look around or mix into more leather-inflected outfits. Compression shirts are available from sports vendors and are surprisingly versatile—you can wear them with gym gear of course, with standard jeans, or with boots and bar vest for a more leather look. Add some BDUs and a black ball cap and you've got the makings of a “tactical” look. A pair of Oakley sunglasses and cowboy boots works great for (as a friend calls one of his aesthetics) “redneck drag”.
Singlets are another great option, and work well for bondage and pup play. A singlet with a tight elastic band around the leg holes lets you tuck your phone and wallet up against your quads.
I've found tights to be less versatile. Most lack pockets, and once you've committed to skintight bottoms it can constrain what you can wear up top.
If you're a spandex person, you might want to know about SlickItUp. Their gear is generally less durable than, say, Under Armour, but is much more entertaining.
Sports Kit
Sports gear has lots of advantages. It's usually breathable, durable, and washable. The designs are fun! It might not meet dress code for some events, but it's usually a viable option for most bars, dungeons, and leather runs.
Starting with your jock and socks you can build a variety of looks. Consider football pants and a practice jersey, or rugby shorts and shirt. Hockey is a whole thing. Cleats are hot (and have delightful applications in trampling play), but on hard surfaces sneakers are probably a safer option.
I'd leave specialty items (helmets, pads, and so on) for later. They can be incredible fun, but their higher cost, bulk, and single-purpose nature makes them less flexible pieces in your wardrobe.
This is less familiar ground for me, but I want to acknowledge that a.) people are very much into uniforms, and b.) you can wear many uniforms in bars, at runs, and parties.
Keep in mind that uniforms reference their associated institutions, and that onlookers may read your wearing the uniform as an uncritical endorsement of that institution. Uniforms of (e.g.) postal carriers, mechanics, athletes, firefighters, and medical staff are broadly unproblematic. Military and prison uniforms can engender a mix of enthusiasm and hostility, depending on context and audience. A lot of people like police uniforms, and you'll likely see them at events. However, given the historical and ongoing problem of generally abusive and specifically racist policing in the US, you may wish to exercise discretion when deploying one in public spaces. I don't think I've ever encountered a Nazi uniform, but you do hear about it from time to time. I think most leatherfolk, myself included, consider this in very poor taste.
Acquiring uniforms can mean going a bit off the beaten path. Keep in mind that most uniforms are a.) mass-produced, and b.) all have to go somewhere: there must be a supply somewhere! If you have a contact who works in the field you're interested in, try asking them how they get their gear. Many uniforms are available from general-purpose uniform supply companies. For military gear, try a military surplus store. You can also get lucky at thrift stores, eBay, or gear marketplaces like Second Skin.
Motorcycle
If you ride, your existing gear (e.g. boots, gloves, pants, jacket, tracksuit, helmet) can all be worn to the bar or during play. Motorcycle boots and gloves can also be combined with other gear (like a rubber catsuit!). If you're looking for motorcycle gear just for wearing, remember that you don't need it to live up to the same safety standards as riders. Feel free to acquire used, even rashed-up gear, or to choose discount brands.
Conclusion
You don't need a single piece of gear to play or participate in most leather spaces. But if gear speaks to you, wear it! Gear can look and feel great, both for you and the people you're engaged with. You can use it to signal affiliation and interests to others. You can attract (or deflect) attention. Your gear can also serve practical purposes when socializing or playing.
Don't feel pressured to leap in headlong. Try one piece first: a simple, inexpensive pair of boots or a leather bracelet is a great starting point. Get a sense for how it makes you feel, how it works in play, how it fits into your social life. Then go from there.
In the next post, I'll talk about some of the tools I love to play with.
